


She's My Collar, Apparently

by Toodentz



Category: Gorillaz
Genre: Arguing, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-22
Updated: 2017-07-22
Packaged: 2018-12-05 07:00:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11572815
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Toodentz/pseuds/Toodentz
Summary: The band gets a bit flustered by the first recording of "She's My Collar."





	She's My Collar, Apparently

“Hey, 2D, I’ve got something here for ya’,” Murdoc suggests. The recording session had fallen dull and the band was getting tired, having spent hours in the studio with various collaborators coming in and out all day. Stu looks over the lyric sheet, raising his eyebrows in question almost immediately. 

“Seriously Mudz, what the bloody hell is your problem? Can’t you keep your kinks out of the workplace for five seconds?”

“It’s not about that!” He protested, crossing his arms and looking back at him matter-of-factly. “And if it was it wouldn’t matter now would it? Would you rather me stop expressing myself through BDSM and start expressing myself on you again?”

“No…” Stu shrugged, continuing to read the lyrics. He didn’t mind the words so much as the side notes and directions about how he should be singing. “Umm… what does it mean when it says ‘heavy panting’? Am I supposed to act like I’ve run a marathon or something?”

“No you cheap shit, you’re supposed to- ugh- do you really not understand that?” 2D shrugged with a vacant glaze in his eyes, genuinely lost on what Murdoc’s creative vision for the song was. “It’s gotta be- you know- primal. Like you’ve just finished having the hottest sex of your life and you can’t catch your breath afterwards. Please tell me you’ve been there before because I’m not about to demonstrate to you, cockwad.” 

“I… I think I can do that maybe. But you really want to put that into a song?”

“I can do whatever the fuck I want. We have a song called Sex Murder Party for Satan’s sake. It’s all about vision,” he explained, droning off on a tangent as Stu completely stopped listening, as he often does. 

As he stepped up to the recording booth, Murdoc glared at him through the glass and mimicked a breathing motion. 2D gave a weak thumbs up and glanced at Russel and Noodle, who were most likely oblivious to what they were about to hear. He placed himself into the moment, tried to picture a time like Murdoc described. It wasn’t difficult considering how easy it is to get laid using the phrase “I’m the lead singer of Gorillaz.” He began his session, Murdoc’s words echoing in his head. His voice was raspy and brilliant, his breathing was tempered. He was getting kind of hot in the recording booth, just based on his nerves and the racy thoughts going in and out of his head. 

Murdoc, meanwhile, was absolutely glowing. It was his exact imagine, the Blue Boy Wonder had done it again! Noodle was awestruck, seeing 2D in a way she hadn’t ever wanted to think of him as in her life. She and Russel was generally just uncomfortable, having to listen to straight-up pornographic noises coming from someone they consider family. It was like listening to your weird uncle describe his college sex life… gross. 

He finished the song on a final heavy panting, and the room echoed out in silence. Once the reality of what he’d just recorded set in, his entire face turned cherry red. Murdoc practically fell out of his chair, actually praising 2D for once. “That was fucking BRILLIANT. It’s exactly how I pictured it in my mind” 

“I hope you weren’t picturing 2D like that,” Noodle giggled, faking a puking motion. 

“That’s not suitable for children,” Russel chimed in, but redacted his statement after some thought. “Then again, when have we been suitable for children?” 

“There was that time we took a bunch of them out into the desert-” 2D chimed, immediately regretting drawing attention to himself.

“Dude that shit was straight up kinky. What have you been doing in your spare time?” 

“I just do what I’m told,” he mumbled defensively, then pointing to Murdoc in accusation, “ -He’s the kinky bastard! I’m just the singer forced to act out his weird fantasies!”

“I don’t bloody fantasize about you, you fucking twit-”

“-I don’t know, Murdoc, you seemed super excited about it when he was singing-” 

“-What I do in my BLOODY BEDROOM is NO BUSINESS OF YOURS-” 

“-Nobody wants to know what you and your crusty ass do behind closed doors you jive ass nasty motha-” 

“Can I leave? I really want to leave-” 

“SHUT UP YOU WHINY SHIT WOULD YOU JUST-” 

“Murdoc you’re a fucking wanker, that’s what I think-”

“SHUT UP NOODLE NO ONE ASKED YOU-”

“NOODLE DID NOTHING WRONG SHES AN ANGEL AND-”

The yelling continued like that for several minutes before Russel decided it was time to stop. He picked up Noodle by her waist in one arm, who was taunting Murdoc and risking pretty severely how much his “therapy” was helping him. Then he picked up 2D by the waist in the other arm, who at that point had turned to mostly half-crying and shouting nonsense in the midst of all the fuss. The continued yelling at each other despite being picked up off the floor entirely, and continued on until Russel had carried them completely out of the room and shut the door.

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally posted at gorillaztrashimagines.tumblr.com


End file.
